My Sexual Awakening: Part Six
Spiritual, Emotional, and Physical Work.
This phase of my sexual awakening is a good reminder that even during a sexual awakening there is work to be done. Spiritual, emotional, and physical work. And yes, the work can be pleasurable. It can also require the acknowledgment and release of decades of neglect, trauma, and hidden pain.
Processing those dense energies is equally painful and freeing. Healing is a process. It takes time and intention. And in my case, it also takes an entire Spirit Team to guide me through and help me heal.
January 20th, 2023.
Mom Spirit came to me on this day. (If you’re new to my blog, during my spiritual awakening, my mom came to me as “Mom Spirit”, a spirit guide. Shortly after this, she started to come to me in mediumship.) I felt her hand on my right cheek. I heard one of our songs. She poured her love into me. I cried and released “lifetimes of sadness”. As love entered, the sadness was released.
Later that day the work began.
“Sexual Energy Work using the (sexual aid)
“We started slow. Relaxing. Penetrating. Crying. Releasing.
“Divine masculine energy was slow and patient and loving.
“Releasing energy blockages, and physical blockages. My vagina eased. The thrusts slow and careful. I released blockages in my feminine.
“Energy work continued. (Meaning downloads, healing energy.) Blockages eased. We remained slow, gentle.
“No orgasms, not the point.
“The energy subsided. Great work.”
January 25th, 2023.
“SACRED SEX, nurturing, caring, gentle, passionate, sexy, and multiple orgasms. Heavenly.”
And then,
“Tears and energy releasing. Doubts & fears. Sadness. Energy work.”
I remember feeling like a washcloth being rung out, squeezed dry. All the effort and work were to remove the the old energy so that we could heal and move forward.
Restless nights brought many downloads. My days were filled with energy work and releasing and learning and growing. My sexual awakening and spiritual awakening were working together to aid my ascension.
January 31st, 2023.
Early on this day, I wrote in my journal about having “a fully integrated soul”. I would imagine that feeling like I’ve just completed a soul integration would be the most exciting journal note, but my sexual awakening stopped for nothing.
Pardon the screaming in all caps. It’s part of the code of my journal.
“SACRED SEX – ENERGY HEALING – KUNDALINI – CRYING – RELEASING
“…so very gentle, engaged. Energy as we made love and opened my vagina. I cried a little. Energy came and went. I got into it, and we went faster. Adjusting for the last blockage, and then a beautiful orgasm.”
February 22nd, 2023.
I was making lunch when I received messages to “pay attention”. I received downloads of energy while at the table eating, and then afterwards was guided to my altar space.
“ENERGY WORK, ENERGY DOWNLOAD, CHANNEL – HUGE ENERGY
“Some creative energy. So much energy. SACRED SEX ENERGY.”
As sexy as some of this is, most of it was work. There was spiritual work as I learned to trust the process and create a relationship with the Divine. There was emotional work in the form of processing trauma, crying, and releasing. There was physical work as in using sexual aids to help clear blockages. Spiritual, emotional, and physical work.
No one said spiritual and sexual awakening is easy. But still, much of it is intimate and beautiful. In addition to doing the work, I was learning to enjoy a sexual life again. I was learning to love an aspect of myself that I had neglected for a long time.
Much of what I’m sharing from my journal was over a year ago. Some of what I experienced is still coming to fruition. New awareness related to my sexual life and awakening is still coming to light. My sexual awakening continues, and writing about it is part of the process for me.
I’m grateful you’re here. I love you.
Be well, beautiful soul,
Nikki
